The Joys (Hahahaha!) of Pugging

That was a sarcastic pathetic whimper of a laugh there, by the way.

Boon is out of town, so I decided that my Tuesday was best spent trying to get in some raids on those characters of mine that never get to see the nonlight of Naxxramas. As opposed to cleaning the house or something.

First up: Keiji needs badges. The likelihood of her getting into a VoA run without another DK that needs the chestpiece, IF it drops, is so miniscule that I'm just going to farm up the 80 badges to buy the chest token.

So I advertise myself for any heroic, and 10 man Naxxramas.

I get swooped up for a 10m Nax, almost full except for tanks. Okay, cool. It's a pug, I don't expect completely smooth sailing, but it sounds like they're all familiar enough with the fights and the like.

I'm a little nervous, since though I've been in Naxxramas enough times healing and DPSing to do it blindfolded (I can probably still tell you how many pulls it takes to get to Gargolmar in Hellfire Ramparts), I've never tanked in there before.

So I immediately hit up the other tank in tells, letting him know that while I know the fights in general, I've never TANKED them before and could he kindly let me know anything particular about the tanking aspects that I may not be aware of. He's cool with it. He only needs ONE trinket out of the whole instance, so anything tank-like that drops, it's mine, all mine!

We hit up military first. After one wipe on Raz because I was learning the whole 'charming the people thing, when do I use bone shield, when do I ask for a taunt, when, what, huh?', we down Raz. We down Gothik.

We have a few wipes on the four horsemen. Why, you ask? Because unknown to me, there's only 2 healers. And the unholy DK in full epic DPS gear is doing barely more damage than me, the unholy DK in mostly epic and some blues tanking gear (I knew this part). So the paladin MT goes holy, saying he can heal himself while tanking the guy, and I'd take the 'burn first' group with all the DPS. The RL says we're not going to switch up front, but just burn straight through. With most of the raid doing a little less than 2k damage (and one doing barely more than 1k, granted, he's off in the back tanking one of the mobs back there), I find this an unlikely win scenario.

Surprise! I'm right. We wind up with like, 7 marks before the Thane (and most of the DPS and the other tank) goes down.

Okay. Fine. The boomkin (who is top DPS) says he'll bring in his holy paladin just for the fight, doesn't mind saving the paladin to the raid, etc. A few more wipes, the back goes down, the RL wants to try one more 'no swap', and then finally I'm tanking by myself with the resto druid on me, the paladin MT is on Thane, and we do the swap method, and we win.

Yegads. Oh... guess how many tanking items dropped? Yeah. None. We swap out a few people, get in a nice warlock that pushes mid-2k dps, and we continue to go.

We go to Construct next. To my COMPLETE surprise, we down Patchwerk in one try. Yeah. Never pictured THAT happening.

We get to Globbulus, and one shot him too. The DK keeps dropping his poison cloud in the raid, but other than THAT, no problem.

Then we go towards Gluth. Now, let me say, when we started, we had two mages. By the time we got to Gluth, we had no mages. We had: roguex2, DK dps, warlockx2, boomkin, tree, holy pal, prot pal, DK tank.

We ask the DK if he can kite the adds. He says he can, sure, but doesn't like doing it.

Then when asked if he knows how to do it, he says no. The RL starts to ask if anyone else feels comfortable doing it... and a few of us point out that he's the ONLY class capable of doing it in the raid. Bonus that he has desecration.

Surprisingly, we get Gluth almost down when the DK dies and we lose it. Then the MT has to go. We swap a few more people. Then the holy paladin says he has to go. And it gets called.

No tank drops for Keiji.

I did get asked by the other DK: u unholy tank? can u do that? (I'm paraphrasing and making it more understandable.)

I exit Naxxramas, they're going to TRY again today. I, oh so unfortunately, have work. I spot Vialora outside of Nax. He says he's in a Nax25 pug. I ask if they have room for a warlock? They do!

I join. Through cajolery, we get a few more KoUers in the mix. The RL is armory'ing everyone. Everyone there is in almost full epics, tier 8, etc. This is going to be GREAT, right?

Spider goes down with only one hitch on the Grand Widow, but we two shot her. I'm on the low end of the Recount at about 2800 dps. The top end ranged in the high 3k, low 4k. This is going to go GREAT!

We go to Plague next. Noth no problem... and then we hit Heigan. O. M. G. I don't think I've ever seen so many wipes on Heigan since KoU first went in on 10man. The tanks kept pulling him too close to the stage, so the healers couldn't heal, so the tanks died. Or the tank would be too far away, so we'd move forward to heal/dps, and then the tank would suddenly be too close again. Like, is he backing up on an S curve through the room or something?

I think we wiped 4 times before we FINALLY got Heigan down. Loatheb was a clean kill (with an amusing 'pre-attempt half-wipe' that happened when someone ran in and aggro'd Loatheb when half the raid was still on the bridge outside of his room). (Granted, at the time, not so amusing considering how many times we all just died on Heigan.)

And then the end. We go to Military next. And we cannot get Raz down. Can. Not. Do. It. The 'lead' spriest wouldn't say when she was starting, she'd be told 'when you're ready', and instead of saying anything, would just slip down there and start casting. Then the other spriest would have to rush to pick up his target. And then the one would pull Raz too far to one side, so the other couldn't get him with their MC target. And people were hitting the MC'd targets with AoE damage? And the call-offs weren't good so the MC targets were taking tons of damage. And they weren't telling when one was being released, or weren't releasing on a regular schedule, because he'd be on one, and then suddenly both he and that target were running at the raid. And the healers weren't keeping the MC targets alive, and we'd run out of MC targets to tank him.

So we called it. Kikidas did get wrist and helm out of there, so not a complete loss on my part. Yet again, another one where they said to get in there again today. Alas, alas, unless I'm inconcievably not part of our Ulduar 25 run tonight, busy for that too.

For the final part of my evening, I went as Keiji to a SUCCESSFUL 10man OS guild-run. No drakes, but meh.

Unfortunately, didn't get the bag of spoils. Those badges would have gone a long way towards my chest piece.

So once again, the joys of pugging are rediscovered. To me, the BIGGEST mind-blow was the UBER Nax25 run that turned into a wipe fest. I think personally it was a bit of 'familiarity breeds contempt'. Everyone knows it well, but slightly different, and with us all KNOWING, no one was leading the attempts with 'tank him here' or whatever, or healing assignments, or anything. The most we got was 'you're MT' to one of the warriors.

So... top five signs that your PUG isn't all it's shaped up to be (and given the already low expectations of a PUG, these are pretty bad!). These aren't in any particular order. Because how do you order these beauties?

5. One of your six DPS is barely (or not at all) outdamaging one of your tanks.
4. The raid leader doesn't vet anyone, just invites people, and then later on asks: 'Does anyone...'
3. You're heading into Gluth and don't have any class capable of kiting the chow. And the RL doesn't notice.
2. The raid leader insists on doing something, when it's painfully obvious that it won't work.
1. The raid leader first says that there isn't going to be vent. And then after one of the DPS finally offers their vent channel, doesn't want to join it. (Or lead.)

As a top five list, it's pretty pathetic, I realize. And it's largely based on my experiences from yesterday, shockingly enough.

In other news... I got Ironman on Kvasira. *rawr*flex*

Proof that DK takes skill!

The debate on the merits of DK floods the internet at the moment! Are they overpowered? A monkey can play one and still push 2k DPS! They take no skill! They're the new 'flavor of the week'! On and on and on.

Now, I will be the first one to say that with a DK, it is possible to put out really nice numbers with little effort. Really, you just have to not be a total screw-up on your rotation and you'll do just fine, right? Right! Which is not to say there are some REALLY talented DK's out there. Those people are scary. You do not want to meet them in a dark alley.

Tanking is a little different, since tanking doesn't just require 'push x, then y'.

But DPS, DPS of all colors and flavors have long been held to be the 'easiest' of the three roles available.

Now, for story-time!

I was on Keiji, looking over her gear, figuring out what I wanted to aim for next. I had just gotten the Seal of the Pantheon out of HoL, so I was finally done with that place on regular runs.

Someone in Dalaran asked: 'Need tank, PST'. (Grammar and spelling have been edited for clarity. Go ahead and take the worst stereotype imaginable, and you'll be close.)

I ask, "For what?"

I then get an invite. Curious, I accept. And I ask again, "For what?"

I'm told, 'regular Violet Hold! We have 2 80's and it should go fast!'

I look and we have an 80 resto druid, an 80 mage, a 77 boomie and a 76 DK.

I still have to do VH on Keiji for the achievement, so I figure, why not. I go wandering on in. As I'm standing there, curious, I look over at the other DK and inspect him.

He was wearing mixed gear, some defense, some dps, some unsocketed, some socketed. He was mostly Blood with a few points in Frost. Okay, I can see it, if a defense piece drops that is better in all ways (except the defense...) to what you're wearing... you'll take it. And maybe he just hasn't had time to buy the cheap 2g gems to socket his gear.

And then he whispers me, "Can I have gold? I have 19g and I can't afford to repair."

K: "No, you can't have gold. I just spent lots of gold on my gear."

DK: "Ok."

DK to Group: Is it okay that I take all the loot drops? I need gold.

K to Group: No, you can't. We all get a share at loot.

Resto Druid to K: I already gave him 10g because he asked!

K to Resto Druid: He hit me up for gold too.

DK to Group: Can I have all the frostweave?

K to Group: No. If people want to give you theirs, they can. But I need money too.

DK: But you can do 80 dailies! I can't!

K: So? You can do lots of quests.

The group gets started. I'm barreling along, practicing my rotation, keeping blade barrier up and seeing how much uptime I could get on my bone shield. And the DK asks if anyone has a damage meter.

Curious, I look at my recount. The numbers?
#1 Mage: 2-3k
#2 Boomie: 1-2k
#3 Keiji: 9-1.5k
#4 DK: 500


Yes. 500.

The DK goes on about how great this group is! Woo yeah! And I notice that he keeps switching from Blood, to Frost, to Unholy auras. Annoying when he leaves it on Frost and I have to blow a taunt getting initial mob aggro because he runs up with his improved distance Icy Touch and whacks the mob first. Whatever.

The resto druid gives me a whisper, "I'm bored. Can I DPS?"

I say, "Sure.".

After the second boss down, the Boomie laughingly says that he just respecced to Boomie and didn't have the best gear and was hoping that his DPS was doing okay!

The DK says, "Yeah, you're doing alright."

The Boomie had also had never been in VH before and wondered what the little red crystal things were for.

DK: Don't touch those! They're for the last boss.

K: Uh. Actually they're usually for those bosses like the water dude with all the little adds. The last boss, you're better off just DPSing on her.

DK: Ok.

Last boss pops.
DK: HIT THE CRYSTALS! *runs around like a spaz and activates all the crystals*

K: Just DPS the boss.

Overall recount... the DK was #5 (#4 was the resto druid). On Cyanigosa, he was also #5, behind the Resto Druid.

The saddest part of all of this? His name started with a K. :(

The moral of the story? Even facerolling monkeys do better DPS as a DK, proof positive that being a DK does in fact take SOME skill!

Memorable PuG Moments

We all have them, you join a PuG and something happens that sticks in your head, either to someone or something someone said... SOMETHING.

Last night I was looking for a heroic for Kvasira, ideally into one that drops one of those coveted expertise upgrades I spent so much time researching.

But I didn't get into one of those. I got into a pug for Heroic Azjol-Nerub.

It was me, a DK, a prot pally, a mage and I dragged Kyuushi from YouWakeIt in with me to heal it. Boon was busy with Vialora watching the Gator's game.

The first warning came when I was discussing with the tank what buffs to give. He asked if I had the one that reduces threat. Then if I had sanctuary.

Blessing of Salvation hasn't been around since before WotLK came out. Sanctuary, iirc, is a prot only buff.

We didn't get to the first boss. The 'chain pull' of three watchers was where we got stuck on. The tank was doing his best, unfortunately. He was new to either the tanking game or the prot pally game or to the heroics game or something, but he just did not do a good job. The mobs would splinter off and kill the healer or the mage. Or they'd turn and start hitting me. Or the DK.

It was sad. We died I don't know how many times before we said, 'Maybe we should try an easier heroic.'.

So we picked the Nexus. Pretty easy, right? The DK had to go, the mage also had to go (due to repair bill concerns). We picked up one of our guild rogues, Shortwinded, and the tank invited a priest he knew... who was holy, but could 'do good dps'. (Which was about 500DPS max)

We're in Nexus and get to the orc boss in ice. The priest eventually leaves because he isn't helping and wasn't aware that he was brought in to 'dps'. We get a mage.

We keep wiping. I eventually get so tired of wiping that I pop off a DI on the other paladin during one of our wipes. (Repair bill save FTW!)

This is where it gets fun.

He says, "I don't know what's wrong! I can't DO anything!"

We say, "You're DI'd."

He says, "But I didn't do it!"

We eventually politely disbanded, grabbed one of our guild tanks, Balendin, reformed with the PuG mage and had a wonderful quick run thereafter.

Of COURSE the Flame-Bathed Steel Girdle didn't drop for me. I just hope the Nexus isn't Kvasira's Heroic Hellfire Ramparts, Kathe's nemesis in the quest for the Tree-Mender's Belt.

I felt bad for the previous tank, because he was TRYING so very hard. I know nothing about prot pally tanking. Kyuushi was helping him as best he could and told him where he could go to read up on it, as well as suggestions to maybe not tank in heroics first.

One day, we will meet up again, little Prot Pally and we will share a chortle over the misadventures of our youth! I have had my share of 'Oh God, am I really that stupid/bad/horrible?'. I won't SHARE them, because yegads, that would be embarassing, but it's happened.